The Dignity of Coincidence

The Dignity Of Coincidence
So many of us believe that we are calm, get along with others and take things as they come yet much of what happens is not a coincidence. If we get frustrated at any point and with any person, place or thing then perhaps we are not so easy-going as we believe we are.

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“Dignity is the moment you realize that you were always the right person. Only ignorant people walk away from greatness.”
Shannon L. Alder

“Dignity is also the moment you believe that love is not about losing or winning. It is just a few moments in time, followed by an eternity of situations to grow from.” Shannon L. Alder

“Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.” Albert Einstein

So many of us believe that we are calm, get along with others and take things as they come yet much of what happens is not a coincidence. If we get frustrated at any point and with any person, place or thing then perhaps we are not so easy-going as we believe we are. I am not suggesting that being upset with a person place or thing is a bad thing. There are numerous items everyday along with many people and places that cause us to be stopped  annoyed and on the brink of losing all dignity.

No obstacles in our way

Most people wake up with an agenda and we are happy or calm as long as no obstacles get in our way. It is easy to say we get along with all  people and things as long as getting along means don’t get in my way or interrupt me. So that comes with a lot of stipulations in order for one to remain calm. None of us think of ourselves as bossy or liking to have things our own way. Likely most of us would say we are compatible and easy to get along with.

The truth of the matter is few of us are easy-going and most of us just don’t like interference of any kind. That is why we have road rage when we miss a turn or someone cuts us off or causes us any kind of set back no matter how small. We want to get to an appointment on time and that means no one struts in our way. If they do we immediately fill will frustration  which leads to stress which results in anger beyond control.

Stop allowing frustration to control

I suppose if we could simply stop allowing frustration to control us we might be able to control the stress and then the anger that  follows stress. It tells me that we don’t look for synchronicity of any kind nor alternative reasons we are delayed. If we did we would not question our daily interference nor our delays. We never stop to think perhaps there is a reason for our mishaps or delays.

I know we can all recall major life occurrences in which people’s lives were saved because they stopped for  coffee rather than heading straight to a job where a fire broke out.  Yes we believe in those huge happenings. What we don’t buy into is the little occurrences that are basically frustrating, stressful and fill us with anger.

No matter what our goals are for the day, if they get mixed up or delayed we are terribly annoyed and I am guilty of this also. I plan on doing some work and the phone rings and a friend needs to talk. The longer I listen the more I consider the call boring and unnecessary. My mind begins contemplating ways to end the conversation and unless I want to lie to them I am forced to continue the chatting   until my friend is completely devoid of any of their own annoying feelings. I suppose they are hanging up  relieved after the conversation while I am experiencing needles and pins, infuriated at having to  endure the encounter.

Change the situation – change thinking

Now I am sensing that in order to change the situation one must change their way of thinking. If I insist on constantly completely my tasks or accomplishing my own objectives without any interference from others I must live in a sealed glass house. This is impossible  so to live among the other people in the world requires that I accommodate their presence and accept their bothersome interruptions with dignity.

The only alternative is to ostracize family members, friends co-workers and every living and breathing creature walking the earth. Of course I would never choose such an alternative so it leaves me with acceptance. If I am honest with myself I recognize the times I was in need of a talk and ended up stealing time away from another without guilt or remorse. That is when enlightenment occurs  and I sort of get the whole picture. We just blot out those times we lost our way and searched for direction.

Somehow I do have faith that the listeners gained something in the encounter. Likely we acquire so much learning everyday that we never planned on achieving. What we hold as important is perhaps not as vital as those meaningless interactions with others. There is a lot to be said for synchronicity. The world has its own plan for us and we are actually cogs in the working.

Every daily encounters add an importance to our own lives. Most of us just don’t see it that way due to our daily schedules. Fitting in the outside distractions of daily living renders our programs meaningful if we took the time to review our daily lives. We apparently don’t have the control over our lives that we believe we have. Once that is observed real life and living happens.

Acknowledge the presence of others

If the world improves with  every kind and loving action perhaps spending more time acknowledging the presence of our fellow human beings is vitally relevant. Each of us wake up with varying problems and burdens. Any relief we receive is a benefit to all of humanity because the flowing wave effect is endless. One kind act can send positive charges a distance we can’t even conceive of.

The tiny voice of a small child in need of a hug and reassurance requires our immediate attention. There are no coincidences. All is happening according to the way it should be. We can be awake in observing what happened and recognizing the significance or we can conclude an interference with our lives which render us annoyed and stressed. By acknowledging we don’t have the control and power we think we have, the more serene our lives become.

Life is a journey of learning and tests of all kinds. Recognizing what is critical is paramount. Knowing what jobs are important to take care of first teaches us the truth about living. As we absorb we realize how comforting and alive we feel when we have succeeded in choosing well. The anger dissipates and the stress is relieved and instead of feeling annoyed we are left having faith in having raised humanity to a higher level. How would we ever believe that was a frustrating annoyance that interrupted our schedule. I am about to throw my plans to the wind and let my day unfold at will. Somehow I will ascertain more than I will buy accomplishing my daily tasks. Perhaps a smile is worth more than an achieved list of items.

“Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.” Maya Angelou

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.” Joseph Campbell

“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” Aesop

“Change your thoughts and you change your world.”    Norman Vincent Peale

“Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success.”     Swami Sivananda

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